生命 … 繼續

網誌

很多人都關心我問:“How are you doing?”/ “How are you holding up?”

我都清一色答:“Very OK!”

YH 甚至在 MSN 跟我說:“Are you sure you OK? You sound a bit high…”

其實,在正常的大部份時間,我說話時都是帶點 hyper 呢!

對。我親愛的好家姐是離開了這塵世。但誰說一定要呼天搶地哭哭啼啼驚天地泣鬼神才叫深切悼念?

我沒有帶著遺憾的讓她走。由 2008 年 9 月 23 日一通 email 我倆冰釋前嫌後,每一天我都跟她相處得很愉快。我可以對她付出的我亦 100% 或更多去付出了。

現在的心情當然是掛念她,但同時間我也為她能往生極樂感安慰,為我在精心替她安排的追思會感到雀躍。因我真的可以替她做點比較反傳統的身後事!

我知到大家姐是絕對不會喜歡被安排到殯儀館去的(我也是!!),外國的 Funeral Home 都是一遍綠油油的草園,給人很舒服很安寧的感覺。但香港的「大酒店」呢,都像有股黑矇矇的氣色,我唯一想到的形容詞是 eerie!

光是就「我不要她去殯儀館,你告訴我如果我要…… 到底有甚麼option?」這句話,都要重覆問完再問講完再講才找出理想方法來。沒辦法,人家都做了殯儀行業幾十年,突然要做些不同的事,難免會對我不停說他過去幾十年說到已很自動化的說話,又或是跟我說「無得咁!」諸如此類的話。這個,我瞭解。當然,我還有我家人那一關要過。無奈,我立場清晰,很 certain 溝通我知家姐要甚麼,還有相信一切都可能的 - what matters 是願意不願意去動腦筋和採取行動吧!

我的出發點是,所有這些身後事不是為在生的人做的,而是為過世的家姐做的!在生的人有心來,我會很感激。但有心人也會知到,我們不是為了entertain 他們。有心想看我姐最後一面?Well, 上次他們的見面就已是最後一面了。Let it be,就隨緣吧!

所以…

「殯儀館?」好恐怖,NO!

「瞻樣遺容?」啊+這麻愛貪靚怎會要人家看到遺容? 再者,有機會讓看完的人感不安又何干?NO!

「化妆?」啊+被打包前我們已替她塗上她最愛的 Chanel lip gloss 啦!啊+ 怎會愛哪些死人妝?還有,都沒有瞻樣遺容,要化給誰看? NO!

「打防腐劑?」噢,啊+在美國信奉的喇嘛說不要打,還有,她現在是被雪藏著的呢!NO!

「火葬場哪裡一個hall 可做追思會。」誰會愛留在那些地方攪?這麼沒class 的地方啊+不會喜歡的。NO!

「不是所有餐廳都會讓你攪這些東西的。」誰說?那我就誠實溝通我會做甚麼和整個構思!

「吉儀?」NO! 不過,啊殯儀先生告訴我其實是有個紅色印著「大吉大利」的信封可用的。太好了,他不說我也不知,好,這個,YES!

原來,在辦親人的身後事有一個有番咁上下高級的殯儀先生是非常重要和幫到手的。除了會安排所有文書工作等,他還有面子、地位、關係等甚麼也好,去安排所謂的「快期」。因此,我啊+的火葬日期可被安排在下星期二舉行 - 真的很快喔!

然後,我會安排一頓很 warm 很靚很 cool 的午餐(俗稱 「英雄飯」)給出席的有心人。地點是在很 classy 的 Heritage 1881 呢!這兩天,我還發動了我身邊的人力去統籌一些神秘的東西,到時會代表我姐送出去的!

Alright everyone, LIFE GOES ON, BUSINESS AS USUAL!

現在讓我先出去好好準備追思會簡單的佈置,明天我還要做一連三天的訓練呢!

Enjoy your day. Appreciate your life.

PS: 啊+多謝妳,因為在替妳辦這些事的同時,妳給了我機會去為我自己將來的身後事好好計畫!I luv u!!!

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  1. Joanne

    have been reading your blog for a period. Felt your look is quite “inch” even though I appreicate what you wrote. But after reading these lately blogs, three letters come from my heart — “WOW”! you are really amazing! What a great sis your sister has! Wish you and your families all the best..cheer.

  2. Carmen

    You are very talented. Hang in there, I am sure you are fine! I have been reading it, so well written and lift my spirit up since I learnt the news.

  3. Rita

    hello.. 我睇你個blog都一段時間喇.. 睇到你呢個既時.我就想即刻留下言.. 我honey係上星期已經攪掂哂佢既身後事喇.. 盡管唔捨得..但如果個儀式係跟住佢在世時想既去做..就已足夠喇..我覺得最岩既係..唔係為在世既人去做.. 而係為往生者去做…肉體雖然走左..但我相信”佢” 真係睇到我地為佢既意願去做而開心..加油 !!

  4. winnieleung

    Hi Joanne: Thank you soooo much for leaving your comments here and share your thoughts. But gal, no kidding! Not only that i look ‘inch’, people always say I m really ‘inch’ hahhahah…. anyway, inch is just one of my faces! I do have a great heart 🙂 Thank you really for your wishes! Enjoy your day. Appreciate your life!

  5. Rita

    多謝你既祝福..我honey都係cancer過身架..但我覺得對佢..對佢身邊人黎講.係一個解脫…依家既佢已經好開心咁行佢要行既路 所以我相信你家姐都係一樣..因為有你呢個咁貼心既妹妹幫佢完成最後一段路.大家加油呀

  6. Patricia

    I admire your attitude and love your spirit. I still remember the speech given by Arlene’s sister in her wedding. I know Arlene has 2 sisters but I’m guessing that’s you. The girl started with “there are 6 inches of height difference and 6 years of age difference between my sister & me…” Arlene’s lucky to have a sister like you. On the other hand, isn’t it fair to say we’re lucky to have such an amazing lady in our lives?
    Wonder who am I? I’m Arlene’s JAL 同期, same as Billie & Pheobe.

  7. winnieleung

    Rita, 你給我的感覺,都是很正面,很樂觀!你honey 一定好幸福有你在他生命出現過。大家一起加油!多謝你 support ah !

  8. winnieleung

    Patricia, thank you for your comments. Yes, i was the sis who made a speech on Arlene’s wedding. and OMG, you remembered what I said – I have 4gotten!! But when I read what you have written…. hahahah that sounds VERY VERY ME!!!!! Thank you for being such a caring and loving friend of my sis. See you on Tuesday.

  9. winnieleung

    Gloria, 定D 嚟!當然唔係啦,係就嚇壞人喇!我唔會有我家姐遺體,因為到時都火化左喇。係在餐廳做追思會的luncheon!定D 定D!


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